I'm creating a procrastination masterpiece. 2 exams tomorrow, and I've already:

1) Put it off til today, because "I'm always more productive under pressure."

2) Justified my lack of studying on the basis of "they're going to be OPEN-ENDED questions. There's just no good way to study for them!"

3) I've been to every class, I already know the material.

4) They're going to be easy, the classes are only an hour long. (??)

5) Decided to come home early instead of staying out, where I'd be forced to focus on studying, because I'd have to eat dinner anyway, and it might as well be at Buckley instead of Towers, plus that would save me having to walk back at night....

6) Ate fattening snacks.

7) Played Dr. Mario.

8) Visited friends' room, because friends are important.

9) Went to Tuesday night meeting that I usually skip, because I've been skipping too much lately.....

10) Blogged.



I need to be more awake for this. Here I go! Really!!

It's Friday! Guess what I did!!


Left my keys in my ROOM.



(Cuz last week I left them in the dining hall).





I'm awesome.

I've been updating rather infrequently these days - noticed?

Had Psych and Accounting exams this week. I underprepared for what I thought would be an easy blow-off exam in an easy blow-off class, and got myelf a B+. I'm one of those people who doesn't like the B+. So that was not good. The accounting I put in some good solid study time for, mostly the day of and some the day before the exam. Absolutely raped it. That was earlier tonight, actually. It was a slow, thorough rape, and that exam was lying on the floor in a pool of blood by the time I was done with it.

I'm having guilt about Jujutsu. I stopped going last week, finally giving in to the realization that I was having to force myself to go, and then watching the clock the whole time I was there. In short, I wasn't enjoying it. So I stopped, and I think I've missed a total of 3 regular workouts now without saying anything to Sensai. He apparently noticed my absence today, and said something to my friends about it. When I think about that, I want to rush back there on Saturday and pretend like nothing happened....but then I'll be stuck in the same place again. I'm glad that I tried something new and that I did reasonably well with it (and I'm very, very proud of my belt), but I know that I do not have, at this point in time, the right attitude or personality that it would take to give Jujutsu the devotion it requires. And I can't half-ass it. That's just a good way to get myself or somebody else hurt, and to hold my partner back. So all that's left is to tell Sensai. A couple Saturdays ago, when I didn't go to the workout, I went to the gym and swam laps, then went to the library and did some reading for class. That doesn't sound like much, but a few hours of alone time can definitely be a blessing.

I finished the RA interview process. I heard through the grapevine (my RA) that I did really well on the group interview. I don't know about the individual interview though - that was yesterday. I either came off as competent, responsible, virtuous, intelligent, and sensible, or just pretentious and talkative. Steph is back now, so no more typing, because the conversation is too stimulating.


Goodnight and stuff, eventually.

Where to start?

Friday the 13th - left my keys in dining hall before class, didn't notice til I got back from classes at 2, then frantically ran around building trying to find them. In English class, read wrong stories, had pop quiz. Bad. Went to one-ton sundae with Jess, got ice cream all over self and posessions. At night, went out with parents, sister, roommate, and boyfriend, left my purse in the car. Didn't realize it til after they had left. Saturday morning, went to get omelette in dining hall, dropped cup, got new cup, 15 people jumped into line ahead of me. Got wrong omelette. Today, I made it ahead of the crowd, but didn't actually get omelette til 15 people got theirs who had put in orders AFTER me. Omelette not that good. Not waiting for omelettes anymore. Today, did laundry, went to UCTV meeting, lasted 2 hours. Had to pee very, very, very, very, very, very, very badly. Went as soon as meeting adjourned. Everybody left. Went to Towers grab & go, was in line for 20 minutes. No buses, walked to south. Very cold. Got purse from Amy, who had been nice enough to drive it up here from Plymouth yesterday. Came back. Here I am. 2 exams this week, haven't done any reading or homework this weekend.

Valentine's Day was good. I wore a red dress. Shawn liked it. It was a good night.

No more blue Powerade.

At work again. I've finished everything on my UCTV "to do" list for the day. I even got some re-filing done. The more I investigate the filing system here, the more I realize that it IS organized, after a fashion. After several fashions, actually. Very detailed records vary in format from year to year. One year, each of the exec board had their own folder. Another, the work-studies did. In others, all the authorizations are together. Transactions are grouped in three different ways - most recently, by date, and others by company or type regardless of date. It's all very neat, just...not together. I'm starting to re-file everything, but it's going to be a big job. At least I have somewhere to start.

I'm still tired, despite having slept the past couple nights. I don't know if it's "sleep debt" from this weekend, or what. Friday night I was hoping was gonna be "relaxing night with Shawn", but kinda turned into "hanging around night at Shawn's while Brian formats his computer." Ah, whatever. Saturday night I had the bright idea that we (Steph, Julie, Alejandro, Nick, etc) should get drunk. So we did, and I promptly got sick. I was the only one, too. Go me. So yeah ,fun night. Sunday I managed to go to work and take minutes during the atypically long meeting and walk to Shawn's afterward, but I was feeling it all day. Yesterday was 4 classes and laundry, then absolutely nothing. It was supposed to be homework, but eh. Today was 2 classes, now work, then dinner and Jujutsu. I'm not excited about Jujutsu any more. I skipped on Saturday (and Thursday too actually) just because I felt I could use my time better, and I did. I went to the gym for the first time in a long time and swam laps, and did some reading at the library. I suppose I'll go tonight, but I'm not sure anymore. I like being able to swim and do my homework at a decent hour. It's gotten to the point where it feels like I'm doing this for Sensai, and not for me.

It's time for me to take a walk back to the Buck.

I'm sleepy. Are you?

I'm at UCTV right now, having just finished updating the Receipts & Disbursements Journal....you know, the one that's almost completely password-protected and won't let me do things like enter transactions? Yeah, that one. I e-mailed it to the business office, having done the best I could, and also having balanced the damn thing. It may not LOOK balanced, but it is. Also took care of some more payroll stuff. This job is slowly getting easier and easier, but the most difficult thing about it is so much depends on the actions of others. Once timecards are out, it's up to every individual person to fill them out correctly. Most transactions have to be signed by one other person besides me. Paperwork needs to be brought places by people other than me - all other people's responsibilites that have to be taken care of so I can do my job correctly. Fortunately, the people who have to do the most are by far the most responsible.

Tomorrow is supposed to be winter-weather-riffic. I've been keeping an eye on the outlook for Friday since yesterday, and it's been consistant in its predictions of snow, rain, and ice. It actually sounds like justification for cancellations, albeit later in the day. We'll see - the last "10-14 inches" somehow turned into 4, so there's no need to get hopes up.

Tomorrow is Friday. So very, very sweet that is. Jess just pointed out to me that I seem to be always working - I leave by 7:30 or 9:30 every day, come back in time for dinner, then I'm either doing homework, at work, or at a club meeting until night - anywhere from 8 to 1am. This past week I haven't been sleeping too well either. I think I'm going to take a quick nap here before I head back out to the business office. Tomorrow afternoon, no matter what happens with the weather, I'm going to relax.

One more weekend down. Late last night when I was filling out my business school application, I decided to check off the "Finance" box. I had always thought I would go into Management, and that's been my intention since last summer. But my work experience of the past couple weeks, and my accounting class, are perhaps starting to point me in a different direction. Finance is cut-and-dry - there's a transaction, for such and such a purpose, for such and such an amount, and it goes through and gets filed away neatly. No bullshit (other than paperwork), just deadlines. Just now I was downstairs in the study lounge reading for my English class, and overheard some of the guys in my building talking about the various cliques they were in, how they developed, some minor philosophy and theology thrown in.....little things bother me, little bullshit things. There's so much that I can and do classify as worthless bullshit - not necessarily the conversation I overheard, but it put me back into this mood. Diversions like shopping, movies, TV shows, etc etc.....all bullshit. Celebrities? Bullshit. Yes, I like to shop. Maybe I'm hypocritical, but I know what I can't stand. Video games? Waste of time. Yes, I occasionally play on my SNES emulator. I think it's a question of excess. Too much shallow vapidity (is that a word?) is what happens when the excesses get thrown together. A diet of MTV, video games, celebrity worship, and bright, shiny diversions.....and here's me with my new digitcal camera.


Why can't anybody just take a walk outside anymore? Why is everybody so insecure and depressed? Why can't most people see through the mass media, blind celebrity worship and make a decision for themselves? I know some people have them, but why don't most have principles? Or do they have them, and are they just really shitty? Am I being too judgmental, or do I just need to get some sleep?

And why does my Psych professor feel the need to say "dude", and why does everybody think he's cool? Are they that spineless that a few Beavis and Butthead clips win them over?


Patriots won the Super Bowl, 32-29.